Mental!

[solomon]

Unfortunately my Mum has had a breakdown and tried to commit suicide- not really only a few pills really a cry for help but... Obviously she is now in hospital, she went in same sort of thing about three years ago. Was just wondering if any of you are married to psychiatrists or know what is likely to happen next. I live 200 miles away from her which makes things really hard. We went tosee her at the weekend and now have her two cats, that makes four in my house[!] She is very paranoid and drugs didn't help last time. Just wish I could understand a bit more. My poor brother lives in Canada and is feeling pretty useless too. Not happy!

[dannyboy]

Oh Sol, how awful - you must be going through hell hun!! I'm sorry I can't give you any advice as I've no real knowledge of this but I'm sending you BIG BIG hugs. xxx

[duckles]

You poor thing (and poor Mum) - I am really sorry to hear it.
I suppose the mental health services will try and help her - doctors, psychiatrists, social workers etc?
I know paranoia is associated with loads of different mental problems (anxiety, depression, etc etc) so perhaps they were not treating her for the right one the last time and this time will have more suitable medication. I am sure she will be referred to counselling or some kind of therapy but I suppose she decide not to avail of this. I think (but am not sure) that they won't let her out of hospital if they think she is still a suicide risk.
Have you any family near her? As you say this is a cry for help.
The only thing I can say is to try and see if she is assigned a social worker and liase with them. Also, while I am sure you are really worried and upset, try not to let it overwhelm you (easy to say I know)- you have to live your own life and you will help your mother most by being sane and happy when you visit her not stressed out.
As you may guess I have some experience of mental health problems in my family and I have always found the psychiatrists/social workers to be extremely helpful and pleasant. So do talk to them as much as you can.
Of course it is a very very stressful and worrying time for you and I hope she gets the right treatment and recovers fully (it does happen). Take care xx

[scattymare]

Oh Sol this must be devastating for you. Speak to the doctors, insist they give you some time to explain everything to you and really push for them to get to the bottom of this. Not quite the same maybe but Neils brother has a mental illness. It took years (including him being sectioned) and a lot of hassling from his parents to get the authorities to do something (other than hospitalise him each time he had a breakdown). He was finally diagnosed as being Autistic and after many trials have now found a medication that works well, There is hope honey. All you can do for now is be there as much as you can and really keep on at the authorities,
Big hugs hun

[fleabitten]

(((hugs!!!!))))

[solomon]

Thanks everyone you are great!! It is hard not to get stressed by it but i am glad at least that she is safe and looked after at the mo and enjoying the food!!

[mossh]

My dad has been through this a lot.
My grandad is currently in hospital due to the same thing.

I'm not entirely sure what they will do next as each case differs but the doctors will observe her and assess her and then begin the treatment, wheter it be councilling, medication, other types of therapy.
I imagine they would put her on some kind of mood stabiliser, probably something different from what she was on last time.
I imagine they may also put her ons omething to help her relax.

There are many things that can lead to paranoia and they obviously weren't treating it right before.

Ask your mums doctors and they should tell you whats going on. If you don't understand, make them tell you in terms you understand and don't let them fob you off.

Your mum won't be (or shouldn't be) released untill she is not a danger to herself or anyone else and this can take time, or not very much time at all!

She is in good hands now, she'll be safe and they'll be working on treating her in the best way now.
Hugs for you xx

[jane]

I am ever so sorry to hear this and am sorry that I can offer no advice, but I think Mosh has given some great advice.

Best Wishes and big Hugs to you.

[racaille]

Sorry to hear this Sol. I feel sorry for your mum but more sorry for you. A cry for help perhaps, but it can also be attention-seeking which is appalling. (Sorry if this sounds bitter, my whole family is bonkers, not in a fun way.)

Do what feels right for your mum but please, please keep in mind that you must not let your life be ruined by feeling you have to be the principal carer or that you are in any way to 'blame'. Mostly no one is to blame but some people use 'mental frailty' as a way of punishing others.

[solomon]

Thank you esp Mosh and Rac, so true i am gonna look after number one best i can. Easier said than done tho...

[florence]

I don't have any first hand experience of this either but I really do feel for you as this kind of thing affects the rest of the family - and friends - emotionally too. Rac and Mosh are right, though. I know two people whose partners were the same and they never really had much of a life for themselves. It seemed pretty exhausting. Or perhaps draining is a better word. It's very difficult but you have do have to keep something back for yourself. Here whenever you need an ear. Hugs (((((((((((((()))))))))))))

[kitcat]

Sol, I'm so sorry to hear this. I don't have any experience of it either but I do have a big shoulder if you ever just want to unload on someone.

[solomon]

Thanks everyone, she is in aresidential unit now, a bit more permanent, and on some medication. Here is hoping she will feel a bit better soon.